Neglect was a very big
shoot in terms of organising all the team members and the props and styling. It
was also one of my first shoots, which presented me with nerves and worries. I
lost a lot of sleep over this shoot, before and after. But now I have the final
images exactly how I wanted them I am much more relieved.
It was a real struggle
to translate my ideas to the team, but I showed lots of reference images and
examples of poses and lighting. The photographer at this early stage kept on
trying to force his ideas into he shooting, which was extremely frustrating and
confused the model. The model has cerebral palsy and therefore quickly got
tired from the shoot, which is very visible in the images and film. I kept on
asking for exaggerated expression to create a very theatrical outcome, yet she
didn’t quite take this on board.
After hours of
shooting, I felt as though we hadn’t got what I wanted and I really got worried
but failed to discuss this with the team. This was an extremely risky move but
I could tell everyone was tired and fed up so I just called it a day. When I
got home I was an absolute wreck. The pressure of the entire project had got to
me and I felt as though this wasn’t in my control.
After two weeks of no
contact with my photographer, the anxiety became too much and I demanded to
meet up with him to see the images before I was driven completely crazy! I was
very honest with him and told him that I wasn’t happy with it at all, especially
as he had already decided to edit and change the images n the completely wrong
way. Although I sound like I am being very dramatic here, this project is just
extremely important to me and I felt that I couldn’t let someone interfere. So
we eventually got one image to the exact style and editing and he went away and
did a few more. Eventually, after being extremely persistent, I got all my
final images form the shoot and edited the film in the best way possible with
what I had. The lighting was so bright and extremely difficult to correct. I
even managed to lay an image over the top that I created in Photoshop to create
the same board-like effect that is visible in the images.
Overall, the stress of
this shoot was all worth it because I am so pleased with the outcome. I love
the raw textures and grittiness there is, rather than an obvious perfect
porcelain doll image. I have had great feedback from this shoot and I am very
grateful.
Scopophobia holds a lot of personal issues for my self-esteem and confidence that have been translated into something I find beautifully disturbing. The process of shooting a naked model takes planning and consideration, but luckily the model was a close friend of mine and had no problem telling me if she was uncomfortable. Prior to the shoot I was nervous about how the product would sit on the skin, even after testing. But the process of layering Aquacolor, plaster spray, talc powder and baby oil has produced the exact desired effect.
We faced many issues within the photo shoot and I was completely exhausted by the stress afterwards. Firstly, the modelling bulbs would not work on any of the studio's lighting equipment and there was no time to try and test each bulb one by one. The modelling bulbs play such a vital part in the production of a successful gel lit shoot as the show exactly where the light is going to hit the model's skin. So we resorted to a very slow trial and error method by aiming the lights onto the model's body and just shooting. After what seemed like hours (days) we eventually began to get the lighting I had in mind. But during this process, the model was tiring and the product started to rub off the model and even create irritation on her sensitive skin. We were really against the time here!
Once we mastered the lighting the images were unbelievable! The texture of the skin was haunting and the tiny hair strands and goosebumps could be seen. Once we knew the lighting was perfect we were able to completely smash out the images. We then faced the challenge of setting up lighting for the filming. Because the lights had no constant light to them we had to use the filming lighting. Not only would this mean that the set up would need to be completely redone, but it meant that it was going to be near impossible to create the same lighting effect. The filming lighting also produces a great amount of heat, too much for the thin sheets of acetate to take without melting. So these were constantly turned on and off throughout the process which massively delayed everything. But we did get there...eventually. And I am more than happy to say the least.
I then faced the next task of getting the images to the exact style during postproduction with the photographer. Although I do love other creative input, his ideas were very forceful and I had a very specific style in mind. After a slight struggle, I managed to arrange a time to sit down with him, choose the images and explain exactly how I would like them to be edited. But this was not the end of it. It then took a very long time to get the images back which created a massive delay in my production schedule and placed a lot of pressure on me to turnover my outcome quickly.
The film footage aim is to better represent the mood of the character. I feel as though this was captured well within the filming and editing. But as you can see, it was extremely difficult to generate the exact lighting after the change of set up, colours and quality of filming. As a result, I am not as satisfied with this outcome as much as the others, but I am still in love with the unusual and unique creative concept I have achieved.
Developing my website and choosing a style that I want to best represent my project is proving to be an extremely challenging task. I really enjoy the idea of toying with the sickly sweet concept of the aesthetic of dreams. Below I have attempted to sketch some potential font designs that I think will aim to get feedback from.
I also really like the idea of having a moving gif font/image for the title and homepage. I think it adds something a little extra to the website design.
Love Magazine have this movement effect on their website as you enter it. I really like this. I think it's playful and artistic. I would definitely like to look into this more once the logo/title is chosen.
I have a vision of how I would like my website to look. I can imagine it then entering onto the individual dream pages/series with the title still present but smaller. The example of Glassbook below shows the sort of size and layout of the title that I would like to achieve.
Again, Love Magazine has provided me with the sort of inspiration for my own website idea. Here you can see the colourful headings with image infills and differing for each series. I can imagine each dream having a different design but with a consistent style.
FEEDBACK:
After the tutor presentation, the response I got from the font designing was definitely not a positive one. After me thinking they were all brilliant ideas, I had a sudden epiphany after seeing their response and also suddenly hated the design and realised it was definitely not the professional message I wanted to portray.
So I scrapped the above ideas and decided to try something new!
My next design attempt came from the term 'head in the clouds', like a day dreamer. So I decided to go with this play on words and see what outcome I could produce.
This was actually initially inspired by album artwork. I have noticed lots of geometry and illustration designs on album covers recently.
I found a bared shouldered image and a cloud image and had a play on Photoshop.
I really hated how skinny the model was and thought that it could promote an unhealthy body image.
So I decided to shoot some images of my own of my friend.
I then had a play with colours of the clouds to see what worked best.
After choosing my favourite design I started to set up my website on muse. I also started to create little icons that the viewer can click on to enter the dream experience. This was just done with appropriate images found on the internet and manipulated on Photoshop to create more interesting images.
CHANGE OF PLAN AGAIN!
After becoming lost with my design development for my website, I decided to completely erase the idea of generating a different website experience for each look. I felt that this idea could retract from the images and lose the complete purpose of the project. Instead of making it interactive and almost immature, I am completely simplifying my ideas. After my meltdown with John, I drew up a plan of how I wish the website to function.
Here you can see a very basic sketch that I will be referencing my design process back to in order to not lose focus on the task ahead. I believe this design brings a more sophisticated approach to the project rather than feeling like it is mocking my unusual imagination and dreams. I have also considered the target market in more depth as my project is predominantly aimed at 18+ because of it's erotic undertones. As a result, the format has a more simplistic exhibition layout.
I have also decided to take a more mature approach to the font and title designs. I will be using the images to infill the writing and the web will be very image based to enhance the exhibition style experience.
'My recurring dream was that I would wake up in a huge bed filled with cuddly toys. Every time I woke up I would be in a different place like an airport or a supermarket, but everyone would ignore the fact that they were walking past a giant bed with a child in it. A man would then approach me. He was tall and skinny and wore black trousers and a black turtleneck. He would come over to tickle and scratch me and I'd scream for someone to help me and everyone would just walk past and ignore me.'
The person who sent me this dream may have been experiencing a feeling of neglect or a may feel irrelevant to someone they care about, resulting in a dream where they are being ignored. The also may have experienced someone making them feel inferior or less knowledgeable, hence the child-like character. The tickling and scratching from a tall dar figure may represent their helplessness and cries for help, potentially as a result of a failure to get help and lack of support in real life.
I have chosen to recreate this dream because I feel that there is a fun element of the initial production of the dream but it can be captured in a really dark and lonely light and transformed into something disturbing in post production. With the right lighting and characterisation I believe that an interesting outcome can be produced.
INSPIRATION:
Love Magazine's AW14 shoot featuring Cara Delevigne shows a playful character with bright settings and props. I particularly like the clashing colours making it look very flamboyant and garish. I will be taking on a similar setting by using multiple oversized toys/teddies to emphasise the character taking on a small child-like and more vulnerable state. These images strongly remind me of a certain Japanese culture called Kawaii, which translates to cute, lovable or adorable. The fashion itself is very animated and includes novelty accessories and brightly coloured hair and makeup.
I aim to create a sinister take on this dream recreation rather than producing a cute and innocent production. Alice (1988 Film) by Jan Svankmajer, "a surreal adaption of Lewis Carroll's classic children's book", shows a disturbing undertone throughout the duration of the film. The lighting has colder blue tones which produces melancholic atmosphere.
Here we can clearly see Alice's clothing, which includes a pink and white pinafore dress with white socks and black shoes. The colours create a innocent, child-like characterisation of the little girl. She is dressed like her dolls, who also sport a short blonde hairstyle with a fringe.
I will be basing my styling on this representation of Alice. The left and right image show the white lace tights and gloves purchase. The centre image shows the dress I have purchased from an online store that specialises in Kawaii Japanese fashion. I have chosen pink and white, not only because of Alice's character, but also because pink symbolises weakness and vulnerability. The white lace represents her fragility and purity.
TIM WALKER:
My primary inspiration for the photography of this dream comes from Tim Walker. His work shows a strong recognisable style and a magically eccentric charm. His images show a great sense of theatrical elements with dramatic settings to produce images with surreal qualities.
'Imaginary Fantastic Bizarre'
This series includes oversized props to create the illusion that the model is very small. This is how I wish to portray my character, surrounding her with large objects. The styling is very feminine and almost doll-like.
'A Magic World'
The model is portrayed as a gentle, vulnerable character, styled in pastel coloured clothing. The model has a lost expression on her face, similar to the concept of the dream where she wakes up in random and unknown destinations. There is a certain fragility presented in the images which I find haunting and endearing.
'Mechanical Dolls'
To continue with the theme of toys and child-like appearances, I would like to create a play on effect by attempting to represent the model in a doll-like pose and style of hair and makeup. Walker again has created a depressing and lonely coldness to this series, which I feel produces a tense atmosphere of darker possibilities.
'China White'
This particular series by Tim Walker shows a very lonely looking character with a clown-like appearance. The blue eye makeup and blushed lips work well with the paleness of the skin and the dull surroundings. The lighting is very dingy but also has more depth in tone than the other images. I wish to recreate a similar lighting during shooting and post production to mimic a similar atmosphere.
MOOD BOARD:
HAIR & FACE CHART:
WIG STYLING:
I managed to find a very bright yellow wig on ebay which was a very reasonable pice. The wig was synthetic but I had enough time and preparation to cut and style is using a steaming technique. The wigs texture was extremely difficult to work with but I managed to get there in the end.
I then released the curls (image on left) then decided I wanted the wig to be shorter so I cut into it more to produce the outcome on the right.
MODEL & PHOTOGRAPHER:
Model: Abbie Hills
Abbie is a very petite model and I can imagine her perfectly capturing the essence of the character I have derived for this dream.
I have also worked with Abbie before on multiple shoots and she is an extremely passionate model so I have every faith in her ability.
'My friends and I were going to Bestival and I was stressing out about washing my hair and desperately wanted to dye it blue but everyone was saying not to. We are at the festival and a girl comes dancing into our group with newly blue hair and everyone loves it. Instantly I am extremely jealous of her hair and I leave the festival.'
"Often jealousy in a dream is
the result of your self image or self esteem being low. It is often seen in
dreams where a young woman feels that another person is more attractive than
she is." - Tony Crisp, Dream Dictionary.
This statement is very accurate as I do suffer from a lot of self-doubt and low self-esteem. Within this dream the girl was extremely fun loving and carefree. I was jealous of her comfortability in her own skin and her confidence to approach a completely new group of people, not just the colour of her hair. Funnily enough, I had met this girl the day before in real life at a photoshoot where I styled a blue wig on her. After waking from the dream I finally decided to take the plunge and I dyed my hair blue. But this didn't alter my self esteem, it only created a distraction from addressing the deeper issue.
I have chosen to recreate this dream because there is a lot of potential to create interesting lighting and produce something different from the other more disturbing dreams. I hope to capture a carefree festival vibe within this shoot but also want to capture an alternative light of the jealousy side of the dream.
INSPIRATION:
Ashish's SS16 collection showed models skating down the runway on skateboards, showing a carefree, youthful attitude, whilst sporting colourfully embellished clothing, makeup and hair. As shown in the middle photo, the models went down the runway having fun and embracing a tomboy-like persona, which captures the personality of the girl in my dream. Sequins and glitter are a reoccurring main accessory at festivals. From my experience of Bestival last summer, sequins and glitter may as well have been poured over my head - it went everywhere1 And this is exactly what they have done to the models. The models all sported sequin covered eyes and colourful, glittery nails - something that will be incorporated into my shoot.
Ashish SS16
'Festival Hair' often consists of a very bohemian look. Hair is often loosely waved with additional braids or hair wraps. Flowers and feathers are also a commonly used accessory in hair at festivals to imitate a hippie/bohemian style. As the dream consisted of the girl sporting blue hair, I will be using a blue wig and cutting and styling it to the desired shape. I will also add braids and hair wraps to enhance the festival theme.
I would like to capture a free spirit element of this character and show how her beauty shone through her looks. A beautiful personality is something to be more jealous about than the exterior. But this girl also knew that she had made me jealous and therefore had a real smug, forced happiness that I wish to present.
MOOD BOARD:
MODEL & PHOTOGRAPHER:
Model: Ruby Munslow
Ruby was the actual girl in the dream!
LIGHTING TEST SHOOT IMAGES:
HAIR & FACE CHART:
WIG STYLING:
I cut and styled the pastel blue wig and purchased a turban because I feel it creates a bit of edge and fashion statement (whilst also disguising the terrible quality of the wig). I also added two hair wraps to the wig with thread and some additional plaints to emphasise that festival feel.
REFLECTION:
I have decided against using Ruby as the model after deliberation of what sort of mood I wish to portray. I have now asked Laya Hibbert. I have worked with her before and she has a very versatile look and love how she can transform herself in front of the camera. She also has a brilliant sassy little attitude for this dream.
