'Neglect' Production

Neglect was a very big shoot in terms of organising all the team members and the props and styling. It was also one of my first shoots, which presented me with nerves and worries. I lost a lot of sleep over this shoot, before and after. But now I have the final images exactly how I wanted them I am much more relieved.

It was a real struggle to translate my ideas to the team, but I showed lots of reference images and examples of poses and lighting. The photographer at this early stage kept on trying to force his ideas into he shooting, which was extremely frustrating and confused the model. The model has cerebral palsy and therefore quickly got tired from the shoot, which is very visible in the images and film. I kept on asking for exaggerated expression to create a very theatrical outcome, yet she didn’t quite take this on board.

After hours of shooting, I felt as though we hadn’t got what I wanted and I really got worried but failed to discuss this with the team. This was an extremely risky move but I could tell everyone was tired and fed up so I just called it a day. When I got home I was an absolute wreck. The pressure of the entire project had got to me and I felt as though this wasn’t in my control.

After two weeks of no contact with my photographer, the anxiety became too much and I demanded to meet up with him to see the images before I was driven completely crazy! I was very honest with him and told him that I wasn’t happy with it at all, especially as he had already decided to edit and change the images n the completely wrong way. Although I sound like I am being very dramatic here, this project is just extremely important to me and I felt that I couldn’t let someone interfere. So we eventually got one image to the exact style and editing and he went away and did a few more. Eventually, after being extremely persistent, I got all my final images form the shoot and edited the film in the best way possible with what I had. The lighting was so bright and extremely difficult to correct. I even managed to lay an image over the top that I created in Photoshop to create the same board-like effect that is visible in the images.

Overall, the stress of this shoot was all worth it because I am so pleased with the outcome. I love the raw textures and grittiness there is, rather than an obvious perfect porcelain doll image. I have had great feedback from this shoot and I am very grateful.